Befriending Spiders: Corona and Unpredictable Fields
by Peter Mascher
When the school and kindergarten in our small village was closed on March 13th this year, the practical consequences of the Corona pandemic reached us as well.
I have to say that Heckenbeck, a village of 500 inhabitants has not experienced a single illness to date, so I am writing from a very privileged position, with only a partial knowledge of how much other people are actually affected, up to and including an existential and health threat.
The Fear Everywhere Feels Like War
The news affected me and even more impactful is the fear that was constantly felt everywhere, that is now arising anew with the approach of autumn.
The baker in the neighboring village spoke of a war situation and there were plenty of slogans of perseverance. However, the “enemy” was hardly to be grasped and could only be felt when one was already infected.
It is like a completely unpredictable atmosphere, a field that reminded me of some documentaries of Nazi Germany. When the Gestapo, the secret state police, knocked at the door, it was too late for escape.
Again, people today are manipulated with this fear of unpredictability, driven out of their inner balance and thereby fall into existential distress.
My Childhood Dream
This reminds me of my first recurring childhood dream.
It was short and clear: many spiders were running towards me approaching me from several directions. I was very scared.
I woke up and called for my mother, who then calmed me down so I fell asleep again.
It wasn’t clear in my dream which of the spiders would possibly bite me, it seemed more like an extended threat, like a “web” from which I couldn’t escape.
In my inner work I connected this dream with my family environment at that time, which was characterized by tensions between my parents. These tensions unconsciously transferred to me as a child and escalated in later years. The role my mother took was also ambivalent; she reassured me, but she was also the source of much of the tension in our family.
The experience of an uncertain field around me seems to have accompanied me all my life and has now been revived in these Corona times.
Integrating the Spiders’ Powers
Over many years, with the help of wonderful Processwork therapists, I developed a positive relationship with the spiders and sufficiently integrated their strength and message. There is a certain power in these animals and the ability to build webs and thus provide for themselves. In some of my more lucid dreams I enjoy flying around like Spiderman. This heroic cartoon figure and I make sure that dangerous figures are safely wrapped in nets.
I learned something about my task in this world, to create webs of support that are virtually invisible and nevertheless constantly available to us humans everywhere.
On the spiritual level these are blessings, or “stardust”; the subtle messages of the universe, which we often ignore during our daily activities and simply wipe away.
Is it possible that the corona virus wants to teach us to perceive more of the subtle signals and structures of our complex reality?
Would it be possible to encounter an unpredictable field so early that there is less powerlessness and fear?
The Sentient Message in the Virus
Now I remember the Big U; the possible path of love, as I think of Arnold Mindell’s words in the context of a second training seminar in Tokyo in 2004.
I go deep into a sentient practice.
Since the virus brings with it an engagement with sickness and death, I follow this energy and go into minimizing impulses and into the perception of subtle signals.
In my imagination, the virus penetrates me and changes something inside of me.
During this time my breath is also minimized and I move into stillness.
It is a journey into the deep essence of my being.
Just like the spiders from my childhood dream, the virus is no longer my enemy.
The message becomes clear: “Accept change and learn to trust your fine sensory perception; your sentient awareness. It leads you to your wise inner place and at the same time far out into the universe.“
The fear of illness and death disappears in me. I feel a deep connection to the processmind, a non-local intelligence that permeates all the processes of my life and constantly provides for change.
Does that help in the practical handling of the corona field?
Yes, I allow myself to be manipulated much less by the fears and beliefs of other people without ignoring the “consensus reality” of the actual events. I also feel much more connected to the people who actually need help.
Relating to my Inner Child
My relationship to myself has also changed.
I asked myself, what part of me is actually having the experience, and what part of me is particularly evident in the inner work?
It is not the adult in me who is afraid of corona, but the child in me who is afraid of this unpredictable danger, as in my early spider dream.
My “inner child” remembers the uncertain situations in my childhood and now wants to be noticed and held. I experience it as essential that my “adult me” from the closeness to the essence level offers my “inner child” a space of acceptance and a feeling of being well cared for. It is my experience that my inner nurtured child helps me to better engage with the challenges and conflicts of life.
It is not only my adult identity that accepts the challenge, but the child within me appears as an inner dream figure and sets a process in motion that would otherwise have remained hidden and secondary in the background.
As soon as our early childhood roots experience healing in this way, our “tree of life” grows with new strength in a wonderful magic way.
“Children we love become adults who love.” It is never too late for that!
By Peter Mascher, Dipl. PW
As a professional musician for over 30 years, Peter Mascher has had a lifelong affair with his beloved instrument, the viola. During that time, his self-realization as a musician grew into a spiritual quest.
He is passionate about working with people and supporting them to contact their personal wisdom and essence states of consciousness. His non-dual perspective of our world forms the core base of his training for conflict resolution, health and relationships.
He has his own practice in his home village, Heckenbeck/Germany working as a facilitator and innovative coach with clients and groups within the private and business sector.
His book, “Dreaming Rocks-Journeys on the Inner Mountain” will be released this fall.
You can read more about Peter and his work at, www.seedplanters.net
Photo Credit: Egor Kamalev